Eric sighs as he holds Sookie to him, thinking of the past, and what mistakes have happened.

All attempts have failed

Both of them are to blame, and even when it was not just their faults, there is the whole issue of others constantly getting involved in their lives.

The most obvious one is Bill Compton.  He has been a pain in Eric’s ass since the beginning.  And Eric suspects that when Sookie was his, Bill did something to her.  He cannot understand how she left him otherwise.

Then there is his own Progeny, Pam.  She is jealous of Sookie, and has not learned her lesson from the past.  He has lost a lover before, but looking back at the past, he truly didn’t love Sylvie. No. He had debated losing her or Pam, and now Eric knows that if you are truly in love, you would do anything to keep the one you love. Unless it makes them happy.

There was the Shifter, the Wolf, and so many others who have interfered.

But he hasn’t lost her yet.

No, if nothing else, her run to him shows Eric that he hasn’t lost her yet.  But because of his mistake, he may end up leaving.

With that in mind, he works to help her.  The woman who he loves so much it breaks his heart to see her.  Then for a brief moment in time, she tells others that she is his.  What he can’t say right now, is that he is hers.  Always has been, and always will be. No matter what realm they may be in.

All my heads are tails

Eric had wanted to get away from it all.  He couldn’t take it anymore, everyone was dying around him, or turning away from him.

Godric is gone, even his ghost seems to have left.

Nora is dead from the same disease he has now.

Pam has fought with him, and he finally released her.  She denies him happiness.  The first true happiness in years, and the first woman he truly has loved.

Sookie had rejected him.  She didn’t care that he wants her no matter what, he loves her no matter what happens.

It may sound like a small list, but each of these people are the very few Eric has allowed in his heart.  Each one has broken his heart in some way.  Each a way of how his life has really descended into a living hell on earth.

She’s got teary eyes

Sookie looks up at him, and realizing he is sick, makes tears in her eyes.  And those tears break what is left of his heart more.  He truly cannot take tears from her.  She is meant for the light, for smiles and sunshine.  For being carefree with her life.  Not having to worry about death, no she is the embodiment of everything that is good in the world, and to have that precious face marked by sorrow is something that makes him feel like a stake being driven into his heart.

I’ve got reasons why

As he gets ready to face Newlin in a few minutes in this ridiculous getup, Eric thinks of his own mistakes.  Of not letting her know how he felt, how it took a spell to take away all the defenses learned over a thousand years of living, did he finally show his Sookie how he truly felt.

She needs to know.  Showing is all good, but when you are working against someone like Compton, who uses his tongue as a worse weapon than silver.  Compton fought a battle that Eric had underestimated him.

He used every weapon and Eric only resorted to the same underhanded tactics in Dallas.  But even then, was after he had heard how pathetic Compton truly was.  He never wanted to have Sookie in danger and him not aware.  It was only later did he find out how many times she was in danger before he did that, that strengthened his resolve that he did the right thing.

I’m losing ground and gaining speed

He willingly gave himself to save her so many times.  Even the one time that he had used her, it was to save her, and to pay the penance for hurting her, he had been willing to die.  He would take down the threat to her life with him, and hopefully leave her in a better world.

But that was not to be.

I’ve lost myself or most of me.

So here he is sitting across from the man who had killed his past love, frantically trying to do what is needed.  He is willing to do anything, to keep Sookie from them.  He will sacrifice everything, even his child who was so loyal to come find him, as long as the woman he loves is safe.

At that moment, Eric realizes he is a shadow of himself.  Some of it was because of how sick he is, but the other part of it was because he was trying to repent.  To gain back Sookie in a way that wasn’t him.

That along with the fact that there is a cure… it is enough.

No… Sookie has not lost him yet.

I dream with open eyes

He works with the cunning in his mind, and he comes back to her healed.  He will do what it is needed to make her his…

And his heart takes another hit.  She has been with him recently. No.  He talks with his lover, the only woman he ever wants, but doesn’t pay attention as his heart breaks yet again.

Then he leaves.

Nightmares haunt my days, visions blur my nights

His nightmare only increases when the fucking Jap asks who Sookie is.  No.  He will not allow another woman of his to be sacrificed to the fucking assholes.

It is the jolt Eric needs, and he wakes up.  The true Eric comes to the fore, and he is planning steps ahead, as he lies to the man in front of him.

He dismissed his lover, only to give her, her freedom.  When he is done with it all, he will come back for her.  But he needs to clean house.

With that in mind, Eric soon excuses himself.  He gives a disgusted look to Compton, thinking this is what he deserves. And that bullshit about Sookie’s blood being the reason he has an accelerated version?  Yeah.

Eric flies to a laboratory he had set up long ago.  This is where True Blood was invented.  This is where he started his revenge over the Japs who had taken his love.  They had been close, but his lab is the one who broke the mystery enough to allow it to be marketable.

Eric chuckles as he walks through the entrance he had installed when the new building was put together.  He needed a way to get in and out of the building undetected.

No, the fucking Dragons had no idea about his little company, who still holds the patent on the missing link.  The deal is that they keep quiet, and Eric rakes in the money from the invention.  But the timing of everything is perfect.

The reason the Dragons are moving right now, is because not only is their money unsafe, but this lab gained control over the patents and the right to allow them to go public.  As well as to launch their own versions.  Much tastier versions.

There is something about patience, but Eric hadn’t cared.  He knew that they would use underhanded tactics to get the missing link, and sure enough, they had.  The product they served was extremely bad tasting.

He moved into the lab, and smiled at the woman sitting there.  “Annalise.”

The woman looks up and grins as she runs to him. “Eric!”

He chuckles.  “Did you find out anything?”

She groans. “That whoever invented this shit needs to be hanged. Even with the notes you stole it has been hard.  It was like the man was insane.  But I heard there was a cure.”

He nods, “I have taken it.  Will that help?”

She nods eagerly, and quickly draws blood from him.

He watches her, and asks softly, “I need to know if it will keep me safe if I am with a human who has the virus.”

Annalise looks up, and she just as softly asks, “Sookie?”

He nods.

Shaking her head, “Will it ever get any easier on you?”

He chuckles, but there is little mirth in it. “I can only hope.  I am more than willing to suffer for the chance to be with her, but-“

She interrupts him, “You want it all.”

He nods.

Annalise smiles, and heads back to her microscope.  Eric stays where he is, and watches her.   He never moves for the rest of the night.  He goes to rest in the light tight lab, and only continues to watch her.

After the last machine has given her the results, she looks back at him.  He gets up and is by her side, waiting.

If it doesn’t break your heart, it’s not enough.

She smiles at him.  “You are now immune.  But…”

He had started to plan, however that but she added in there pauses him.

“She will die.  She is not human, Eric.  And while this disease is harmless to a human, it will kill her.  One of the things it does, is attack the iron in the cells.  She is part fairy.”

He swallows.  “What choices does she have?”

Rubbing the back of her neck, she tells him bluntly. “She needs you.  And a dose of your blood every day.  She should be dead now, but somehow she is surviving.”

He looks up to the ceiling, closing his eyes momentarily.  He asks, “Was Compton right about her blood?”

This is where Annalise has an evil smirk on her face. “Only if he has drank large quantities of it, and has given her large quantities of his.  In a way, by doing exactly that, he made the virus in her change to match him perfectly.  He made his own death.”

The two look at each other, then laugh.

She then sobers, “Eric, she isn’t human.”

He frowns at her. “You have already said that.”

Looking up at him, she searches for the right moniker, then meets his eyes, “Ok, try she is no longer mortal.  She will remain as she is.  So far this is the only good thing from this virus, is that because of her being a fairy, and the way it affects the iron in her, she has become more other than human.  The Iron in her blood restricted her Fae side.  Now, it is basically gone.”

His eyes widen.  “So that means she will not have to be turned.”

She nods.  “But how to make her understand?”

While Eric is staring at her, he finally says, “Write it up.  She is not dumb.  And wait by the phone.  I will do what I can to make her understand.”  The thought that she will be with him until they are done with this realm makes him happy.  She will have her Sun. And he will still have his moon and stars.  They will have the best part of them both.

If it doesn’t break….If it doesn’t break….If it doesn’t break enough… If it doesn’t break your heart…

Eric lands in front of her house.  He had taken care of the Japs, having a ball doing it.  He was done with it all.  His Sookie will be living a long time, and he just doesn’t need to deal with taking the trash out anymore.

However, when he got there, he smelled something, and felt Sookie not at home, but close.  He turns and strides to her, soon hearing the sound of…dirt hitting a wooden surface?

Vamping to her, he sees her pushing dirt in a grave.  He stares down at her in shock.  Then the moon strikes the plaque in the ground, and he blinks.  “Bill Compton’s grave?”

Sookie nods from where she is. “He was dying.  Then the bastard asked me to shoot him with my fairy light, knowing it would make me normal.”

A frown appears on Eric’s face. “He wanted you to be…normal?”

Still pushing the dirt, Sookie nods her head. “Yes.”

Not understanding, but wanting to see her face, Eric moves quickly, and soon has the dirt filling in the grave.  He stands there brushing the dirt from his hands.  He holds the mostly clean hands out to her.  The damn clay loam that makes the dirt what it is in Louisiana considered dirt doesn’t always clean off all the way, but he figures it is no worse than what is already on her hands.

Sookie sighs, then takes his hand standing up.  She looks down at the grave, and shakes her head.

Eric watches her, and feels the sorrow in her.  His heart breaks, and he hopes she will allow him a chance.

Closing her eyes, and then giving her head a last shake, she looks at Eric.  “What are you doing here, Eric?”

He stares down at the one person he loves more than any other on the earth right now.

Pam he loves, but not with the intensity that he does for the small blonde in front of him right now.  The closest would be Godric. But even he doesn’t come close to the emotion that sits in Eric for the woman in front of him.

He should have known that Sylvie wasn’t love.  Because it didn’t break his heart when she was killed.   Sookie came in front of Pam.  He would choose her each and every time.  And that right there tells him the difference since he had even put his life in front of hers in Dallas.

Eric was not willing to risk his progeny for Sylvie, but he had risked his own life for Sookie multiple times.  And that made it apparent to him what he felt was real.

All these thoughts race through his mind while he looks down at Sookie and with barely a hesitation for her to know of, he tells her, “I have some news for you.”

Looking down, she thinks.  Then she shrugs as she starts towards her home. “Might as well tell me.  Seems death bed confessions are in for me right now.  What would you like to tell me?”

Falling in step beside her, he asks, “Death bed confessions?”

She nods, “I got Bill’s.  Seems he loved his human family more than all else.  But he was willing to do me a favor as he leaves the wretched existence.  As well as some more information.  But basically the same old information as he told us that day, but in Bill’s mind, kinder.”

Eric stops and grabs her arm to swing her to face him. He searches her face and finally asks, “Did he explode as Nora did?”

Swallowing, Sookie shakes her head as she stares into his eyes. “No, the bastard wanted me normal, like that would make a difference now.  Like anyone would believe that my powers were gone.  As the so called gift was being offered, all I could think, is that he would take away the last of my defense.  I refused, and he asked me to end him.  He dug his grave, put his coffin inside, wanting to be close to his dead wife as he could be on this realm, and asked me to kill him so that he could join her.  So I drove a broken end of the shovel into him.”

Eric blinks and then his jaw clenches as he understood what the wretched Civil War veteran had done.  He had asked the woman who had loved him to kill him so he could be with his dead wife.

Sookie sighs and she looks off to the side.  “But the funny thing?  I wonder what would have happened if he had just died when I first met him.  He had buried himself at his grave one night when the house in Monroe had caught on fire, killing those vampires there. Then there was the time he risked his life by coming after me in the daytime when Rene had caught me.”

Then she looks him in the eyes, “How much worse could life truly have been?  So much was made worse by his presence in my life, and he never loved me.  Loved my blood, yes.  Me?  No.  I was just an easy source of blood, and later he was obsessed with it.”

He looks down at her, watching her.

Looking up at him, she shrugs, “Do you know I was happier when seeing you, in calling myself yours, for that one lousy night, than I have since you left?  Even though you are dying, and I really hate this damn disease, I wish you wouldn’t leave.  But I let you go, knowing you would die with more dignity.”

Then she frowns looking up at him.  Her eyes squint, and then she grabs his jacket and yanks it off his shoulders.

Eric can’t help himself and purrs to her, “If you wanted me to strip, I would be more than happy to do it for you faster, lover.  Unless you wish to do it yourself, then you will be more than welcome to remove it all.”

Not thinking, Sookie thumps him in the chest, then grabs his tank and pulls it down to expose his chest.

He can’t help but chuckle at her.  When she gets closer, and he can feel her breath on his chest he cocks his head to the side as he enjoys the closeness.  “If you wish to drive me crazy, you could bite me a little.”

Her eyes narrow, and she looks up at him, “What happened?”

“I took the cure.  I am clean.  And I am vaccinated from ever being reinfected.”

She blinks.

He watches her, and shrugs his jacket back on, and then taking her in his arms, he leaps up.  She had froze and he wishes to get to her house so that she is not at risk out here in the open.  She might have the immortal living part down, but she can be killed just as he could be.

Landing outside her house for the second time that night, he strides to her front door, and she is aware enough to state, “Eric Northman, be welcome into my house.”

He grins down at her, and once inside, sits her down on the couch.  He shrugs out of his jacket, and mischievously sheds his shirt also.  He then kneels in front of her, allowing her to see with her own eyes, his body that is clear from any black lines.

Sookie looks over him, and then leans to look at his back.  “My goodness!  Eric… Did you take the only cure, or is there a way to heal others?”

Grinning at his little Fae, he tells her, “I have my lab right now working to make a serum to start distributing the vaccine.  I will sell it as part of the new synthetic blood that was about to hit the market in a week.  This way it will be able to vaccinate all vampires all over the world, as well as any new ones.”

A smile lifts the corner of her lips, but it was not a normal one for her.  He reaches out and cups her head.  He really looks at her, and he can see how pale her eyes are.  “Sookie, have you been feeling more fatigued lately, as well as craving red meat?”

She looks to him, and she thinks over what he is asking.  “Eric?”

He stares at her, waiting for her to answer.   She slowly tells him, “I have been, but I haven’t fed any vampires beyond the one time Bill.  Even then it was not enough to make me Anemic.”

He watches her and then tells her carefully, “Sookie, Hep V is killing you.”

She shakes her head quickly, “But it doesn’t affect humans!”

He tells her clearly, “But you are not completely human.”

Standing up quickly, Sookie shakes her head again. “But why would it affect me and not a human?  I am immune to anything that the Fairys are allergic to!”

Running his hand through his hair, Eric stands.  “You remember the blood the government took from you?”

She nods.

“Well it was my labs they used for testing.  And anything with your name on it, is flagged.  My top scientist is the one who handled your blood.  She didn’t need much of it, but she cleared you herself.”  He watches her as he tells her, “Then Pam asked her if you could heal me.”

Not moving, Sookie watches him.

“Annalise tested your blood, and couldn’t find anything.  Then she exposed it to the virus in my blood.  When the results came back, she used every example of the virus she could handle, and the results kept coming back the same.  Then last night I arrived with my blood vaccinated.  She used the samples to see if you were exposed, would you reinfect me, or would my blood heal you.”

Sookie’s head drops, “Let me guess.  It was a no on both sides.”

He lifts her head up to look him in the eye. “You will not reinfect me.”

She tells him bluntly, “But there is a but I can hear in there mister!”

“Hep V attacks the Iron in human cells.  Normally this might make them slightly tired.  But in your blood, it was dangerous.  The iron in your blood helped you stay human, no matter how much of your fairy side was coming out.  It…tempered you.  But this was fragile balance.  Drinking from you severely would do the same thing if you were not given our blood to counteract it.”

Sookie is watching him, then tells him, “But Bill drained me almost completely, and I almost died from it.”

His jaw clenches and there is a tic in his muscles in his jaw from the pressure.  Then he takes a deep breathe, “Did he give you blood to replace it?”

She nods, “After he found me again.  But I was in Fairy, in a dream.”

“I don’t think it was a dream, Sookie.  I think you were actually crossing over until he gave you blood.  But the problem this time is, that it is permanently gone. The virus is attacking those cells, and it is wiping them out completely from your system.”

She shakes her head, going to back up, but instead falls on the couch. “Then I will die.”

He had stood up when she had, but he kneels by her side, “Annalise says if you take my blood every day, that you will not die.”

She closes her eyes. “That is not fair to you Eric.”

He lifts her face again, “It would be an honor for me to feed you my blood.  But I suspect it will tie us together.  In fact, I would insist on it, Lover.”

“And what will happen if does?”

He looks into her eyes, “I will leave the realm with you.”

Sitting up straight, she tells him, “NO!  I won’t be around long enough anyways!  I won’t have you dying in a few short years!”

Cupping her chin, he repeats, “You will not die if you take my blood every day.”  Then his head lowers a tad as he expands on that with one word. “Ever.”

She freezes again. “Ever?”

He nods slowly. “Annalise says that your Fae side will take over, but you will need the infusions of my blood to keep enough Iron in your body to keep your current body, otherwise, you will pass to the Summerlands as a full fae.”

She swallows.  This is not what Sookie wanted.  But she asks, “As a vampire?”

He shakes his head. “As you are now.  I suspect, that you will find yourself not limited in time. You will never age even the fraction that a Fae does, since you will have daily infusions of my blood. Basically, you will live as long as I do, while still enjoying your food and sun.”

A tear slips out, but she asks, “But why would you want to have to keep by your side.  What if you grow bored of me?”

And this is what Eric was waiting for.  It is time to lay it all down on the table.  “I will never grow old of you, Sookie Stackhouse.  What I feel for you is love.   You are the only woman who ever broke my heart, made me hurt.  And that is love.  I thought I loved once before, and ended up, when given a choice between Pam and her, chose Pam.  However, I have chosen you each and every time, even above my own life.  I risked my life to protect you in Dallas.  Not once, but twice.  I offered to die for you in the Fellowship.  Then later I jumped in front of you in the nest when the bomb exploded.”

His voice gentles. “Then, I threw myself in front of a werewolf to protect you.  I was going to give up in the office, just wanting my kiss, then Pam kicked my ass.  By mentioning you.”

Sookie shakes her head, “She used me to make you change your mind?”

He chuckles, amused by the shock in her voice. “No, she told me to use you to save my life.  I then realized that without me, you would be taken by Russell, and kept as a blood slave.  I wasn’t willing to risk you to save me, however, I was willing to risk myself and you, to save you.”

A tear falls from her eyes, and Eric caught it on his finger, and licked it.  “I risked everything for you time and time again.  I love you, Sookie Stackhouse, and no matter how I try to fuck you out of my heart, how I try to hate you, I can’t.  And to my shame, I have done both.  But one look from you, shit, one thought of you is enough to make me fall to my knees.  When I thought I lost you, I allowed myself to be infected.  I wanted to free both of us by dying.”

A light ignited in Sookie’s eyes, “Eric Northman!”

He laughs, “There she is.  The other Lady who resides in my heart. I have missed her, Sookie.  Fairy Sookie and Human Sookie.  I can’t let either die.”

She was still pissed. “I can’t believe you tried to kill yourself!”

Unable to help the smile on his face, he stops her hand from slapping him, and instead kisses it. “Pam stopped me, but you gave me the fire to continue.  You needed someone to protect you, and it shamed me I was in no shape to do it.  You gave me the will to live again.  I may have lived in the shadows until you lived out your life, but I would be there, protecting you.  Like you said, it wouldn’t be like the vampire race would forget about you.”

Still shaking, Sookie demands from him, “And now what?  Am I supposed to let my legs fall magically open for you?”

Eric chuckles again, and replies, “If you wish.  But you will take my blood.  I wish to make our Bond more permanent.  And I will be by your side until your done.  I love you, and I will do whatever you wish.”

Sookie blink the tears in her eyes away.  She asks, “This is an odd talk, Eric.  Today has been just odd.  I had to sit there and listen to Bill tear away any ideas of love I had for him.  Then I had to listen as he tries to kill me even after he is dead.  I had to kill my first lover.  My first lover.  Then bury him.”

He watches her, and makes note of the emotions in her.

“There is a lot of time to think when you are climbing out of a grave, as you bury someone you murdered.  And I thought of the last time I was happy.  And that was when I saw you again.  I told myself, that if I ever got another chance with you, I would take it. For what was worth everything?  I suffered, I bled, I almost died so many times.  And the only person who truly trudged along with me was you.  You gave me everything, you stayed by me, and when I drove you away, you came back to save me.”

Feeling hope flare up in his body, Eric listened.

“So, I will take you up on your offer.  Only if you do one thing for me.”

“Anything lover.  Ask of me anything, and I will give you your hearts desire.” He promises her.

“Help me burn the assholes home.”



  1. What a line to end .on!!! Brilliant. Well thought out and presented, lovely story.

  2. Good for Sookie, taking back her power. However, sad she’s had to go through all that, apparently it was all needed to get her to where she is with Eric. So glad Eric’s ok, I know he wanted to kill Beehl himself. However it happened Beehl’s dead.

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